Queueing in Tesco, I notice this sign above an innocuous-looking white box behind the till:
Under no circumstances must anything other than the pod be inserted into the pod shoot.
Hmmm. I look around. Nope, I’m not in Star Wars. Definitely still in Tesco. But I do have a question. The obvious question that any right-thinking human would be asking:
What, the fuck, happens when you put something that’s not the pod in the pod shoot?
I have no idea what the pod is or does. I also have no idea what the pod shoot is or does. But I am overcome by an unshakeable urge to insert something that’s not the former into the latter anyway.
Of course, there will be people who work in that Tesco who do know what the pod is for. Consequently, they’ll also no doubt know what the pod shoot is for. Which raises another pertinent question:
Why is anyone who does know what happens when you put something that’s not the pod in the pod shoot doing it in the first place? Why is it happening so much they need a sign to warn people off doing it? And, again, what the hell happens when you insert something that’s not the pod into the pod shoot?
It must be AMAZING.
The following, while entirely made up, is a conversation I imagine must happen on a daily basis on the shop floors of Tescos around the country:
“What’s wrong with the pod shoot?”
“Dunno. It started making funny noises after I inserted something into it.”
“What did you insert? Was it the pod?”